DEREK B
(UK, two Top 40 hits, one Top 40 album)

In 1988, THE world was waking up to rap, and the aforementioned Mr B (a name nicked from what Baldrick called his master in the previous year's Blackadder...maybe) did his bit, with two waxings of noise plein des messages and morals and the usual convoluted claptrap associated with any rapper not from the Bronx.

Biggest Hit: "Goodgroove", "Bad Young Brother", both No.16, both 1988
Defining Moment: Indifference.

ERIC B AND RAKIM
(US, three Top 40 hits, one Top 40 album)

OUR MEMORIES are appalling. We vaguely recall "Paid In Full" but can't shed any more light on it. However, our man DEREK can. It sampled Ofra Haza, and provided the origins for the M/A/R/R/S groundbreaker "Pump Up The Volume", while also featuring the famed line 'this is a journey into sound' which so many dance acts unashamedly swiped for their own cacky releases. We consider ourselves thoroughly enlightened now.

Biggest Hit: "I Know You Got Soul", No.13, 1988
Defining Moment: "This is a journey into sound".

B B AND Q BAND
(US, two Top 40 hits, no Top 40 albums)

Endured the scarce ignominy of having a single enter the charts at No.40 and then see it fall down again, which was very, very rare in the 80s though happens all the bloody time now. The song in question, "Genie", was unremarkable, which more or less sums up their career too. Fared better, but only slightly, with "(I'm A) Dreamer" a year later. Their full name was Brooklyn, Bronx and Queens Band, but shortened it for fear of being mispronounced by illiterate, tongue-tied DJs, a la Fuzzbox.

Biggest Hit: "(I'm A) Dreamer", No.35, 1986
Defining Moment: That all-too rare bit of chart factoid.

BAD MANNERS
(UK, nine Top 40 hits, four Top 40 albums)

Glorious ska comics with meaningless lyrics delivered by brace-wearing, slaphead blubbermound lead singer Buster Bloodvessel. Grabbed the intellectual highground with debut single "Ne-Ne Na-Na Na-Na Nu-Nu" and then the shoulder kick frenzy of "Lip Up Fatty" as Bloodvessel made sure all within earshot moved every muscle and sinew in their bodies without the need for prompting. Best attempt at 'proper' artistry was "Special Brew", which peaked at No.3 and was, like most of ver Manners work, improvised by Bloodvessel at first outing. He performed it on TOTP in a rocking chair while wearing a grass skirt, so his aim to become an 80s version of Val Doonican was making progress. Using top-notch costume became a regular gimmick for the Big Bald One, as he dressed as Henry VIII for the next offering, "Lorraine" ("and when I find her, I'm gonna kill her") and their appeal increased, as even those who found their music gutless still enjoyed the spontaneity and humour of it all. Deliberately poor covers of "Can Can" (a Christmas disco must until about 1985) and "My Boy Lollipop" (with appropriate alteration to confirm Bloodvessel's sexuality) followed before they all called it a day and the country got its breath back. Nowhere near as credible as Madness or the Specials, but just as much fun. Bloodvessel now earns a day's fame a year as owner of Margate FC whenever they reach the first round of the FA Cup. Terrific stuff.

Biggest Hit: "Special Brew", "Can Can", both No.3, 1980 and 1981
Defining Moment: Just proving that fat, bald idiots can be stars. And having a trumpet player called 'Hotlips'.

PHILIP BAILEY
(US, two Top 40 hits, one Top 40 album)

Testicularly-challenged falsettoist who had Earth, Wind and Fire connections before re-emerging in '85 with the massive "Easy Lover"  ("you're not the only one 'cause seeing is believing") which paired him with Phil Collins, resulting in the only time a song featuring Collins in the 80s didn't sound like a Phil Collins record. Go figure. Bailey followed it up with the dire "Walking On The Chinese Wall" and buggered off. Duetting with Phil Collins clearly had serious repercussions for a career even back then.

Biggest Hit: "Easy Lover", No.1, 1985
Defining Moment: Corpsing at Collins' arse-clutching choreography suggestion in the "Easy Lover" flick.

ANITA BAKER
(US, one Top 40 hit, two Top 40 albums)

Another R&B high-pitcher, with one power ballad to her name, the gently-inspiring "Sweet Love" ("hear me calling out your name, I feel no shame") which was covered by Three Degree-clones Fierce in '99. Badly.

Biggest Hit: "Sweet Love", No.13, 1986
Defining Moment: The song ALWAYS features on every 'new' loved-up compilation album.

ARTHUR BAKER
(US, one Top 40 hit, no Top 40 albums)

Don't let the stats fool you. Baker was a walking production wizard - still is - yet somehow got the main credit on 1989's "The Message Is Love" which featured the Rev. Al Green on vocals and some troupe called the Backbeat Disciples. Baker's name appears next to 60 per cent of remixes and rightly so, as he's the best at them.

Biggest Hit: "The Message Is Love", No.38, 1989
Defining Moment: Being asked to remix absolutely everyone.