JACK 'N' CHILL
(UK, one Top 40 hit, no Top 40 albums)

Instrumental deadbeats whose own tiny contribution to the '88 revolution was the rotten (and very craply titled) "The Jack That House Built" which got to No.6 on a re-release. Justice dictated that no more hits followed.

Biggest Hit: "The Jack That House Built", No.6, 1988
Defining Moment: Nonentity status.

FREDDIE JACKSON
(US, two Top 40 hits, three Top 40 albums)

Yank soul balladeer who released a sizeable chunk of singles but only really struck a chord with one, the sentimental "Rock Me Tonight (For Old Time's Sake)" which was pleasant, if rather sickly. Albums sold well considering his less than high singles profile, with only one other unmemorable release penetrating the Top 40. Short bloke too, with a rather strange moustache.

Biggest Hit: "Rock Me Tonight (For Old Time's Sake)", No.18
Defining Moment: The above song.

JANET JACKSON
(US, seven Top 40 singles, three Top 40 albums)

By far the youngest of the extended Jackson family, and arguably the most likeable too. Having already married one of the DeBarge family and then dumped him before she got famous, baby sis Jackson launched her own pop career amid nudge-nudge cynicism that she only got her contract through family connections, but she actually turned out to be rather good. Her songs swayed from sexed up funk slammers to pouty, semi-nauseous ballads, but despite one or two stinky moments, normally with the ballads, she came up trumps. Opening hit was the clumping "What Have You Done For Me Lately?" ("ooh ooh-ooh ooh yeah!") with the aid of a decent melody and a small amount of novelty factor helping it to No.3, followed by the title track to her critically-acclaimed debut album "Nasty" ("oh those nasty boys"), which made the Top 20. Two more singles later, Jackson faltered with the first ballad, which made a lucrative No.3 but in terms of artistic merit, put her on a par with bog-standard soul production line warblers like Cherelle. "Let's Wait Awhile" ("before we go too far") pleased teenager-protecting parents with its theme, but just sounded dippy and far too innocent for someone with a broken, turbulent marriage behind her and an erotic stimulant running through her harder tracks. Not to mention an arrogant creation of a word which didn't exist in the English language. Oh, and the fact that it sounded like Five Star. Jackson disappeared in '88 and came back a year later with careful, robotic choreography (with gratitude to Paula Abdul) to some top-rate funk hits, including the robust "Miss You Much" and the anthemic and absolutely brilliant "Rhythm Nation" which was remixed time and time again with devastating effect. This was Jackson at her best - stern, strong and ballsy. She flitted between more slithery ballads and bigbeat melodies in the 90s, as well as going all out rock with "Black Cat", before settling into a middling, pleasant R&B sound which suited her well. Big bruv Michael was reportedly jealous of her success and shunned her, which is a bit like Jackie Collins being envious of Jilly Cooper for selling so many upper-class humping novels.

Biggest Hit: "What Have You Done For Me Lately?", "Let's Wait Awhile", both No.2, 1986 and 1987
Defining Moment: "We form part of the rhythm nation!"

JERMAINE JACKSON
(US, three Top 40 hits, one Top 40 album)

One of Michael's sibling back-ups from the Jackson Five, Jermaine was the only other brotherly Wacko clan member to forge a solo career, though it wasn't an enormous success. Two Top 10 hits were yielded, five years apart, but releases were few and far between, as if he just sporadically popped in to the studio to have a singsong when he wasn't doing something more urgent. In '80, "Let's Get Serious" got to No.8, and in '85, the rather broody "Do What You Do" ("I was crazy for you, you were crazy for me") got two places higher and still gets semi-frequent medium wave play. And to think he once had to stand behind a microphone and sing "tweedly dee" all day.

Biggest Hit: "Do What You Do", No.6, 1985
Defining Moment: "Why don't you...do what you do when you did what you did to me..."

JAPAN
(UK, nine Top 40 hits, three Top 40 albums)

Spooky, confusing combo from the traditions of New Romanticism, in that they used synths and wore loads of make up and guerish clothing. The problem was that they didn't seem to have any actual fun with stardom. At all. Such a detrimental factor probably boiled down to their meanly posed photos and the fact that lead singer David Sylvian, despite a uniquely haunting voice, couldn't carry a tune in a commode. As a result, their records were at best odd schmaltz, at worst calamitous tosh, no matter what they tried. Only three of their Top 40 entries reached the Top 20, and while "Ghosts" in '82 was a reasonable success at No.5, it took a surreal cover of Smokey Robinson's "I Second That Emotion" to get them back into the Top 10. The whole thing petered out by '83 and Sylvian went on to pursue a reclusive solo career which is documented elsewhere. They had the looks and the image which suited the era to a tee, but they didn't have the tunes or the attitude.

Biggest Hit: "Ghosts", No.5, 1983
Defining Moment: Never, ever smiling.