KARYN WHITE
(US, two Top 40 hits, one Top 40 album)
WISTFUL, ATTRACTIVE but ultimately nothing-new Yank soul diva type who delivered a very moving vocal on dead-marriage weepy "Superwoman"
("all that's missing is the morning kiss that used to greet me") which was
admirable also for getting 'breakfast', 'coffee', 'sugar', 'cream', 'eggs' and 'toast' in the opening verse without being laughed out of the room.
Basically it was a story of a woman fed up with being unappreciated by her husband, so the women identified with the song while men looked longingly at the pub whenever it came on. We personally think the hubby should have
released a counter-single about how crap she was in bed, but we're cynical on things like that. It stuck fast at No.11 for three weeks, which is a bit
unlucky, and it may just have saved a few marriages along the way. Follow-up "Secret Rendezvous" was much more uptempo and therefore almost wholly
ignored.
Biggest Hit: "Superwoman", No.11, 1989
Defining Moment: "I've got my pride, I will not cry, still I can't help but
care..."
SNOWY WHITE
(UK, one Top 40 hit, one Top 40 album)
ABSOLUTE WIZARD guitarist who is in constant demand for his plectrumwork from all corners of the musical spectrum, and flirted with the charts once
in '84 on the gorgeous "Bird Of Paradise" ("so you fly away, but
will you come again, so I can watch you play, in the pouring rain") which rose
majestically to No.6. So good that it can't be pigeonholed to any era, and the elongated axe solo at the end still takes your breath away.
Biggest Hit: "Bird Of Paradise", No.6, 1984
Defining Moment: "My bird of paradise, sweet bird of paradise..."
WHITESNAKE
(UK, ten Top 40 hits, seven Top 40 albums)
HIGHLY WATCHABLE rockers at the more approachable end of the metal scale who bummed their way through the early decade before suddenly becoming
superstars outside their genre. Led by Yorkshire-born curly permed blonde bombshell David Coverdale, previously Deep Purple's
focusable singer, they broke through the Top 40 ranks in '80 with "Fool For Your Loving"
("I'm so tired of trying, I always end up crying") which he had initially written
for BB King but ended up taking his band's own version to No.13. Plodding through a succession of albums, Coverdale and his henchmen were a hit in
Europe and Asia, but really wanted to crack America, so much of the mid-decade was spent relentlessly touring and plugging and promoting, with
the British market barely getting a look in. Signing to rockcentric label Geffen helped, but Coverdale then became ill to the extent that his doctors
said he may have to prepare for the possibility of not being able to sing again. Thankfully, his sinus trouble cleared up and the band returned to the
studio to record a gaggle of material more commercial than they had ever managed before. It worked, in a chart market of '87 which was embracing Bon
Jovi and Def Leppard, making the timing spot on. Serenading softrock anthem "Is This Love"
("is this the love that I've been searching
for") got to No.9, as did the much raunchier "Here I Go Again"
("like a
drifter I was born to walk alone"), both of which were even bigger in the States, with
the self-titled album earning a clutch of awards. The rest of the decade was unable to cope with such a sudden peak, and they returned to consolidatory mode, though they had deservedly gained a fair number of new fans. Coverdale
split the band in the 90s and regrouped with a new set of backers, and is still banging away for the sizeable chunk of diehards relying on his every
word. Decent stuff all round, and worthy for being digestible by the many without alienating the more precious few. And Coverdale still looks very
healthy indeed.
Biggest Hit: "Is This Love", "Here I Go Again", both No.9,
both 1987
Defining Moment: "Here I go again on my own, going down the only road I've
ever known..."
JANE WIEDLIN
(Us, one Top 40 hit, no Top 40 albums)
HELIUM-VOICED ex-stooge to Belinda Carlisle in the Go Gos, who had one short burst of top-drawer solo success in '88 with "Rush Hour"
("baby when you're at the wheel, I can't believe the way I feel")
which still
gets an admirable amount of airplay and has the sort of insurmountable rhythm (not
to mention an obvious title) which gets it on to every single compilation album entitled "Drivetime" or "On The Road". Famously
re-recorded for a Chris Tarrant jingle for Capital FM's breakfast show, so it went
"it's
Tarrant in the rush hour...". Nothing more afterwards.
Biggest Hit: "Rush Hour", No.12, 1988
Defining Moment: Being complimentarily bastardised by Tarrant.
EUGENE WILDE
(US, two Top 40 hits, no Top 40 albums)
AVERAGE, GEEKISH soul singer with ludicrous moustache who crawled his way into the Top 20 in '84 with the seduction-story "Gotta Get You Home
Tonight" ("a bottle of Dom Perignon to get us in the mood, and an atmosphere that's
sure to please you") which was dribbly enough to guarantee permanent Radio
2 and late-night 'prisoners corner' type airplay for eternity, even though for a song about seduction, it wasn't remotely sexy. Little more after that.
Biggest Hit: "Gotta Get You Home Tonight", No.18, 1984
Defining Moment: "Oooh baby, gotta get you home with me tonight, gotta
treat your body right, make you scream and shout all night..."
KIM WILDE
(UK, ten Top 40 hits, three Top 40 albums)
POUTING, UNSMILEY singer who is rubberstamped in the record books as the most successful British solo female of the decade, even though her records
rarely rated above average and her voice was decidedly dodgy. She emerged in '81 with a good heritage, being the daughter of 50s rocker Marty Wilde,
therefore immediate pressure and comparison was placed upon a bottle-blonded youngster in a stripey T-shirt whose voice was heavily tampered with via
studio technology. Not that it mattered, as debut hit "Kids In
America" ("New York to East California") shot to No.2 and "Chequered
Love" quickly pursued it into the Top 10. The songwriting was strong, with her father and brother Ricky doing the handiwork for the prodigal daughter to bulldoze
through in the studio. Much of the mid-decade saw her continue in the same vein but the country had grown tired of a woman who seemed artless and
without much attitude within herself, content to just churn out the same heap of throwaway teenage pop and take the money. Her stage presence was
duff, her singing rather scrawny and disguised, and it took a cover version to get her back into the Top 10 in '86. Her version of "You Keep Me Hangin'
On" ("get out, get out, get out of my life") hardly paid homage
to the glorious Motown roots of the original, but it was lapped up for sheer simplicity factor and flew to No.2. Two '87 Top 10 collaborations, firstly
with Junior Giscombe and then, festively and jollily, with Mel Smith, paved the way for a real resuscitation of fortunes in '88, with a more mature
sound which paradoxically did not alienate her belief that staying controversy-free and safe was the best way forward. As a result, three songs
consecutively hit the Top 10, with the powerful "You Came" ("you
came and turned my life around, no-one could take your place") and the poignant
"Four Letter Word" ("when love says goodbye it's a four letter word")
among them. She had a big, public affair with Chris Evans before marrying a far less
loose cannon who was much younger than her, dabbled in musicals and started the tricky comeback-every-two-years routine, which predictably failed to set
the world alight. Despite her 80s status (and the fact that she was the most successful British female of the decade shows just how short on talent we
were), she never really achieved enough or was quite good enough to make that status viable, though she was easier on the eye than most and had a
glint in her own eye which hints at a more feisty, adult existence away from the public gaze. Had she transferred that to her onstage persona, it might
have been a different story. Amazingly, she is now a professional gardener.
Biggest Hit: "Kids In America", "You Keep Me Hangin' On",
both No.2, 1981 and 1986
Defining Moment: "Set me free why don't you babe..."
MATTHEW WILDER
(US, one Top 40 hit, no Top 40 albums)
LEGENDARY ONE HIT wonder of "Break My Stride" ("nobody's gonna
slow me down, oh no I've got to keep on moving") fame, which was a jaunty piece of
optimistic pop and got to No.4 in '84, revealing to the world a slightly gawky looking American with curly hair and a droopy moustache. He looked so
unlikely as a pop star, and given a few extra months, was no longer one anyway.
He later went on to top his bank balance by producing No Doubt's 1997 album
"Tragic Kingdom" which shifted millions and spawned the worldwide No.1
"Don't Speak", which got him his retirement villa in the sunshine.
Biggest Hit: "Break My Stride", No.4, 1984
Defining Moment: "Last night I had the strangest dream, I sailed away to
China..."
(Thanks to THOMMO for further information)
SUE WILKINSON
(UK, one Top 40 hit, no Top 40 albums)
NO BELLS ARE ringing here. The song was called "You Gotta Be A Hustler If You Wanna Get On" which means absolutely bugger all to us. We rely on you,
therefore, so please drop us a mail when time allows.
Biggest Hit: "You Gotta Be A Hustler If You Wanna Get On", No.25, 1980
Defining Moment: None yet.
WILL TO POWER
(US, one Top 40 hit, no Top 40 albums)
INSIGNIFICANT YANK bi-gender duo who did "Baby I Love Your Way - Freebird"
in '89, which we're pretty sure is a needlessly re-titled cover of Peter Frampton's piece de resistance, but we're not sticking our necks out due to
bald cowardice on our part. We'd like to know all you know, so there's an address for such requests. Please use it when you can.
Biggest Hit: "Baby I Love Your Way - Freebird", No.6, 1989
Defining Moment: None yet.
ALYSON WILLIAMS
(UK, three Top 40 hits, one Top 40 album)
STUNNING SOUL girl who had enjoyed a couple of decent hits in early '89 which we'll mercilessly gloss over, because her third single "I Need Your
Lovin'" ("toniiiiiight") is a firm favourite of ours, being one
of the most authentically erotic ballads ever recorded, helped by a splendid lolloping
beat and a great vocal from a woman who sounded like she meant what she was saying. Little followed it, but it's a great legacy which maintains a good
aphrodisiacal aid prior to a bit of the other.
Biggest Hit: "I Need Your Lovin'", No.8, 1989
Defining Moment: "I need your lovin', toniiiight..."
JOHN
WILLIAMS
(US, one Top 40 hit, no Top 40 albums)
YANK ORCHESTRA leader whom, along with his seated cohorts, did the soundtrack for the major film of '82 which has since been devalued by many a
shoddy BT advert. "Theme From 'E.T. - The Extra-Terrestrial'" reached
No.17 while millions wept at the film to the extent of preventing a summertime hosepipe ban. Whether they borrowed a Bontempi organ to score the porn
version "ET - The Extra Testicle" we're not sure. Not to be confused
with classical guitarist John Williams of "Cavatina" notoriety, which still
sounds totally watery and crap.
Biggest Hit: "Theme From 'E.T. - The Extra-Terrestrial'", No.17, 1982
Defining Moment: "Phone home..."
VESTA WILLIAMS
(US, one Top 40 hit, no Top 40 albums)
HALF-REASONABLE Yank gospelly soul type of amusing boil-in-the-bag curry moniker which kept kids amused while considering whether to purchase her
character-filled single "Once Bitten Twice Shy" ("I keep
screaming") which one or two did until it got to a kicking No.14 in '86. Nothing more.
Biggest Hit: "Once Bitten Twice Shy", No.14, 1986
Defining Moment: The song.
BRUCE WILLIS
(US, two Top 40 hits, one Top 40 album)
SINGLET-WEARING actor who briefly capitalised on his worldwide heart-throb status as the star of Moonlighting with two wanky cover versions in the form
of "Respect Yourself" ("if you don't respect yourself ain't
nobody gonna give a good cahoot") which got much higher than the Kane Gang's version of
'84 but was nowhere near as good. His version of "Under The Boardwalk"
("on a blanket with my baby is where I'll be") was almost too gruesome to hear,
though of course thousands lapped it up and parted with their cash because, as always in these situations, it was that bloke off the telly so it must be
good. Hollywood beckoned, which suited him much more, as he would have hardly earned a penny had he become a full-time singer, whereas his film
career has seen him rise to the very pinnacle of big-screen greatness, even if he can only play one underdog-beats-the-bastards type character.
Biggest Hit: "Under The Boardwalk", No.2, 1987
Defining Moment: Die Hard.
MARI WILSON
(UK, two Top 40 hits, one Top 40 album)
BEEHIVE-HAIRED caterwauler who will go to her grave with "Just What I
Always Wanted" ("but you don't give me anything and I don't ask you")
stapled to her headstone. That song steadfastly tried to show that some women do exist
for love and honesty, rather than a huge wardrobe, lots of cash and a millionaire's lifestyle. Which we still find hard to believe, frankly. Mike
Read later had it re-written for a very, very crap Radio 1 jingle during his not-great brekkie show days, and Wilson only charted once more, with an
unnecessary version of "Cry Me A River". Still memorable, and the song
still sounds innocent enough to make good listening.
Biggest Hit: "Just What I Always Wanted", No.8, 1982
Defining Moment: "Woah, just what I always wan-ted!"
WINDJAMMER
(US, one Top 40 hit, no Top 40 albums)
ALMOST TOTALLY obliterated Yank soul conglomerate who took the wimpish "Tossing And Turning"
("I wake up in my sleep") to the Top
20 in '84, and then buggered off again.
Biggest Hit: "Tossing And Turning", No.18, 1984
Defining Moment: Non-recognition.
STEVE
WINWOOD
(UK, two Top 40 hits, five Top 40 albums)
MASSIVELY RESPECTED ex-Spencer Davis Group and Traffic trendsetting hippie who enjoyed a fruitful album career in the 80s while occasionally flirting
with seven inch records when a man of his stature could be bothered. The two successes were "Higher Love" ("thinking about it, there could
be higher love") and the re-issued "Valerie" ("call me, call on
me"), both of which settled happily into the Top 20. Far too good for a mere singles chart.
Biggest Hit: "Higher
Love", No.13, 1986
Defining Moment: "Bring me a higher love, woah..."
WOMACK
AND WOMACK
(US, four Top 40 hits, one Top 40 album)
ECCENTRIC, POLISHED twosome who were oppositely gendered and somehow related (though we don't know the exact nature of that - were they married?) who
released clever, passionate pop with tragic undercurrents, much of which was for
a discerner's ear only. Debut hit "Love Wars" ("we gotta get
our act together, take it on the streets") was blessed with some sloppy
yet edgy and raw harmonies and reached No.14 in '84, and the remarkable '88
comeback single "Teardrops"
("footsteps on the dancefloor
remind me baby of you") was wonderfully catchy and melodic. They looked
awful, but had a great commitment to their cause and weren't going to let trend or popular culture get
in their way, with the strength of those two hits seeing them through.
Biggest Hit:
"Teardrops", No.3, 1988
Defining Moment: "She cries on every tune, every tune, every tune..."
WONDER
DOGS
(UK, one Top 40 hit, no Top 40 albums)
LORD HAVE mercy on our souls. A group of dogs release a single called "Ruff
Mix" and there are enough poor sods out there who bought it to the extent
of a No.31 placing. We don't know it, but we can only dream of just how crap it
was, yet it was probably ten times worse than the level which our own reluctant
imaginations can muster. Still, the royalties would have kept the canine stars
in Pal and lamp-posts for a good while. That's if they saw any of the money at
all...
Biggest Hit: "Ruff
Mix", No.31, 1982
Defining Moment: Someone bought this, for God's sake...
WONDER
STUFF
(UK, four Top 40 hits, two Top 40 albums)
RAGBAG COMBO with great roughness around the edges and more synonymous with the early 90s really, but their star began in '88 when "It's Yer Money I'm
After Baby" just crept aboard the Top 40, with staunch progress being made
thereafter. Not quite among the shoegazing clique, as their songs were much too
boppy and fun to hear (not to mention lacking guitars) but their hard topic
choices and willingness to break rules gave them a good following, even though
they got folkier as they got older. Three more hits followed until the end of
'89, our favourite being "Golden Green" ("she's loved and she
is welcome in our home") which was flip-sided and should have got so
much higher than the plebby HMV customer permitted. The 90s brought epic hits
like "The Size Of A Cow" and THAT collaboration with Vic Reeves on
"Dizzy" which sauntered all the way to No.1, plus the anthemic
"Welcome To The Cheap Seats" which allowed another starring role as
harmoniser for the ace Kirsty MacColl. It came to an abrupt halt shortly
afterwards, but they were worth all the money you could throw at them.
Biggest Hit: "Don't Let
Me Down Gently", No.19, 1989
Defining Moment: Try '91 and Vic.
STEVE
WRIGHT
(UK, one Top 40 hit, no Top 40 albums)
PRATTISH, PERMED, 'posse'-accompanied Radio 1 afternoon DJ forever tagged as
'zany' who would very occasionally put out a single based on a character his
researchers had thought up for his show. He did this three times in the 80s,
with only one "I'm Alright" ("if you're alright you can't go
wrong") getting anywhere, finding a dubious No.40 slot which would have
made Tommy Vance's chart countdown interesting for that week. The other two
didn't get anywhere near the Top 40 threshold, though his sidekicks did make the
Top 10 in '91 as Arnee and the Terminators and that infamous Uzi Nine Millimetre
which was making a nation's ears bleed in the afternoons that year. Wright's
show was quite superb a lot of the time, amateurish and contrived a lot more of
the time, and after a disastrous stint on breakfast in the mid 90s (and a
crapper-than-crap stab at presenting telly shows) he shuffled away silently into
the corridors of big sis Radio 2, where he remains to this day doing quite a lot
of the old stuff again, only more mellowly. He hasn't made a record for years.
Biggest Hit: "I'm
Alright", No.40, 1982
Defining Moment: Filleting fish, filleting fish, give me fish to fillet...
PETE
WYLIE
(UK, one Top 40 hit, no Top 40 albums)
SCOUSE LONER of Wah! and Mighty Wah! semi-fame who reverted to his proper name
in '86 to record the terrific "Sinful" ("hey Joe I got the
news tonight, should I laugh or should I cry or should I stay and fight")
which rose above Wylie's station to find No.13. Went into management and
production and all that ex-rock star stuff afterwards, re-recording the song
badly with the Farm in '91.
Biggest Hit:
"Sinful", No.13, 1986
Defining Moment: "It's sinful, it's tragic, it's sinful, it's
tragic..."
BILL
WYMAN
(UK, two Top hits, one Top 40 album)
ERSTWHILE TEEN-KNOBBER of Rolling Stones legend who dipped his feet in
experimental solo waters during a tax break (probably) in '81, and emerged with
two singles of forgettable nature, namely "(Si Si) Je Suis Un Rock
Star", which got to No.14, and "A New Fashion" which got nowhere
near No.14. When Mick and Keith were ready, he quickly went back to life as a
dinosaur of great rock and roll, and started humping Mandy Smith a few years
later while she was still in pigtails and doing geography homework. Wyman left
the Stones in the mid 90s to concentrate on a new jazzed up band who are quite
fantastic. He did marry Smith, who then turned into a skeleton and divorced
him, so Wyman then married a woman in her 30s, which prompted one wag to say
'Outrageous - she's old enough to be his wife'.
Biggest Hit: "(Si Si) Je
Suis Un Rock Star", No.14, 1981
Defining Moment: WRINKLY WYMAN SEDUCED 14 YEAR OLD SHOCKER! - more on pages 2,
3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8...
